Am I a Writer Now? Reflections on Grief, Growth, and Connection

Turning vulnerability into connection, one word at a time.

Last week, I shared a deeply personal story about the loss of my mom’s house in the Palisades fire—the house I grew up in. I was so appreciative of the support I received from that post. So many of you reached out with kind words, your own stories of loss, and reflections that reminded me of the power of connection. I’m deeply grateful to each of you who took the time to read, respond, and share. It reinforced something I’ve been thinking about lately: the importance of community, especially during times of grief and transformation.

Community has played a huge role in my life. It’s part of why I started a men’s group. I wanted to create a space where men could openly share their struggles with body image, food, and self-worth. Over time, that space has grown into something much bigger than I imagined. It’s not just about the topics we discuss; it’s about the connections we build—the way we show up for each other. There’s something profoundly healing about being seen and heard, especially in a world that often tells us to keep our struggles to ourselves.

Writing here on Substack has felt like an extension of that. When I started this newsletter, I wasn’t sure what it would become. I have never thought of myself as a writer. I started writing here to share more about my work and some random thoughts and insights I have been having. It was more of a marketing endeavor than a place to share my feelings. But as I’ve shared more of my stories, I’ve started to see how writing helps me process emotions, make sense of difficult experiences, and connect with others in ways I never expected. Without judging if it’s right or wrong, it feels easier to write what I’m feeling rather than talk about it. It’s made me wonder: am I a writer now? And if so, what does that mean for me moving forward?

The response to last week’s post has also made me think about deepening the sense of community here. Substack has a chat feature where readers and I can have more direct, real-time conversations. I’m also exploring the idea of creating a Discord group—a space where we can connect, share, and support one another in a more interactive way. I’d love to hear your thoughts. If there was a small cost associated with it, would something like that resonate with you? Do you think it would add value to your experience here?

As I reflect on these ideas, I’m reminded that both writing and community are about connection. Whether through words on a page, a conversation in a men’s group, or a supportive comment from a reader, connection has the power to transform. It helps us heal, reminds us that we’re not alone, and pushes us to grow in ways we might not have thought possible.

As of this writing, there is still space in my men's group. If you are interested in joining, please let me know.

So, here’s my question for you: how can we keep building this connection? What would make this space feel more interactive and supportive for you? Whether it’s Substack chat, Discord, or something else entirely, I’m open to ideas. Let me know your thoughts in the comments, or email me directly. This space is as much yours as it is mine, and I’m excited to see where we can take it together.

Thank you, as always, for being here. For reading. For sharing. For reminding me that even in the hardest moments, there’s so much strength to be found in connection.