When folks meet me, they ask, as most of us do, “What do you do for a living?” The responses I get when I tell people I’m a dietitian are usually pretty interesting and reflective of the person’s feelings about food. Most people assume my work is putting everyone on a diet or telling people precisely what they should be (or not be) eating. This is the complete opposite of what I do, but I understand the assumption. That is precisely what I thought I’d do as a dietitian when I started this journey. It’s the traditional path that most of my colleagues take. What I’ve come to learn is that a particular path is riddled with shame, rigidity, and bias. A perfect example is the dreaded meal plan. I rarely give someone a meal plan, and here’s why.
Why Meal Plans Backfire
Let’s be real: meal plans sound great on paper. A list of what to eat and when to eat it—bam, problem solved, right? If only. Here’s the deal: meal plans are similar to New Year’s resolutions. They have good intentions but tend to crumble when life gets messy. And guess what? Life always gets messy.
Rigid Expectations
Meal plans set this rigid expectation that you’ll follow it perfectly, day in and day out. But what happens when you don’t feel like eating grilled chicken, broccoli, and rice for the third time this week? Or you don’t feel like cooking? Or don’t you enjoy cooking and never really want to do it? That plan doesn’t flex with you—it’s like a stubborn GPS that won’t reroute. And when we can’t stick to the plan, we feel like we failed, but in reality, it’s the plan that failed.
Short-Term Fix, Long-Term Struggle
Meal plans are a classic “Band-Aid” solution. They give structure and control in the short term, which can initially feel comforting. But over time, they can make eating harder. Why? Because they don’t teach you how to eat based on your own unique life. When you’re handed a meal plan, eating becomes a checklist, not something you learn to navigate yourself. Eventually, that list runs out, and you’re left right back where you started—only now, with an extra side of frustration and shame. Let’s be honest, too; meal plans are easy for dietitians. Once you have one template down, it doesn’t take too much work to modify it for each new client. I’m all for easy, but I’d argue that meal plans prevent us from being creative in the session.
Loss of Autonomy
Then there’s the independence factor. When you’re following a meal plan, you’re not making choices—you’re following someone else’s instructions. If you ever got a meal plan from me, it was full of what I thought was a “good meal.” My preferences and tendencies always showed up. Eventually, you start to feel like you’re stuck on autopilot. You might even begin to doubt your ability to make choices for yourself. Relying on a plan keeps you from learning to trust yourself, and if there’s one thing I know, it’s that trusting yourself around food is everything. This is the most significant negative impact when it comes to meal plans. It does not foster trust in ourselves and our bodies.
Why No Meal Plan = Real Freedom
Okay, so if meal plans aren’t the answer, what is? It’s the unglamorous, slightly chaotic world of learning to eat without a script. I know—it sounds terrifying. But hang in there because not having a plan is the best “plan” in the long run.
Building Trust with Food
When you’re off the meal-plan hamster wheel, you build something more valuable: trust. Yep, the thing that meal plans tend to stomp all over. Without a plan telling you what to eat, you’re left with just yourself—and that’s good. You start paying attention to when you’re hungry, what foods you genuinely enjoy, and what satisfies you. It can be more than a little rocky at first, like walking through an unfamiliar space at night. But, if you wait a few seconds, your eyes adjust to the darkness. Once you walk through the space enough times, you begin to remember where things are and can trust yourself to navigate the space based on just knowing your environment.
Adaptability
Here’s the truth: life is unpredictable. Your favorite lunch spot closes early, your friend invites you out at the last minute, or you’re just too tired to cook. A meal plan doesn’t adapt to any of that. Think of improv comedy. For some, it’s a giant leap not to have a script, but once you learn to listen and never say no to what your partner offers, you get comfortable with the unscripted performance. When you’re used to going unscripted, you’re free to roll with whatever comes up. You make choices in real-time based on what’s best for you at that moment. It’s the same with food. Meal plans can’t teach you that skill; they can’t teach you flexibility. Discovering flexibility is where the real freedom is.
The Hard Part (But Why It’s Worth It)
I’m not going to lie: ditching the meal plan is hard at first. It’s uncomfortable. Sometimes, it feels like being left in the wild without a map. But here’s the thing—learning to eat without a strict guide isn’t about losing control. It’s about finding a new way to eat that works for the long haul.
Yes, there might be days when you feel totally lost. You might wonder, “Why can’t I have a list to follow?” But the reward for pushing through that discomfort is a new level of confidence and independence around food. Eventually, you’re not just surviving without a plan—you’re thriving because you’ve built the skills to make choices that feel right for you.
Takeaways: Starting Your Unscripted Journey
If the idea of eating without a meal plan feels overwhelming, here are a few steps to get you started on your own path:
Give Yourself Permission to Eat What You Enjoy
Without a meal plan, you’re free to eat the foods you actually like—not just what’s “allowed.” Try picking something you enjoy and paying attention to how it makes you feel. Does it satisfy you? Are you feeling good? This is all part of learning what works best for you.Experiment with Flexibility
The next time life throws off your usual meal plans, see it as a chance to adapt. Didn’t have time to make lunch? Instead of stressing, see what’s available and make a choice based on what sounds satisfying, not what based on what you should eat. Over time, this adaptability will become second nature.Reflect, Don’t Judge
Not following a strict plan makes it easy to feel like you’re doing things “wrong.” But instead of judging yourself, reflect on what worked and what didn’t. Every meal is a chance to learn more about what you need—and to practice a little self-compassion along the way.
Embracing the Unscripted Journey
Ultimately, not having a meal plan might feel daunting, but it’s also freeing. It’s about freedom from rigid rules and learning to enjoy food without second-guessing every bite. So go easy on yourself, lean into the messiness, and remember you’re building something more potent than a checklist. You’re learning to trust yourself—a journey worth taking.
Love-hate relationship with meal plans.
Always hoped that by following them that I'd get results. Always disappointed when they didn't or they didn't last.
Following intuitive eating path, no meal plans, challenging at first. Still working on trusting my own intuition, needs and desires around food choices. It gets slightly easier every day.
Not gonna lie, there still is a small part of me that's still looking out for the ideal meal plan that can address all my various issues, including weight, but also, my chronic diseases. Rather than looking for a directed list, I'm trying to incorporate different foods into my eating, that can have a gentle effect on my body.